Between
by also known as LuLu
Summary: Of risks and devotion, resistance to change, and the meanings of the promises behind "I love you". Slash.


**Disclaimer:** Newsies isn't mine.

**Author's Notes:** Something I was randomly inspired to write. This is different from my normal writing because I'm forcing myself not to name the characters, but to rely only on concise diction, indistinct pronouns, and dialogue over prose. Guess the pairings ^_^ 

Between

by LuLu

Two were standing on the bridge overlooking the river. Though he and the other were positioned close to each other, it felt like there was a much greater distance between them. The warning wind whisked through the empty space, tousling their hair and rumpling their clothing, and continued blindly over the edge.

"I love you," he said abruptly.

But the other would not answer; he only continued his gaze over the water and the light that skimmed its surface. Here, it was the best place and the best way to watch the familiar comfort of the setting sun. 

"Don't you love me?" he asked through his silence. "You said you did." And then he added softly, "You said you always would."

"I didn't say that." The words were terse. Simple. Bitter. Just like him.

"You did. I remember that you did," he argued, almost pleading. Since when had he become so dependent?

"What, did I say it three months ago? Six? Twelve? I'm telling you, it doesn't work like that anymore."

"So you get your heart broken and break your promises as revenge? Just to justify your pain?" he challenged.

"That's not how it is," the other said. "I don't break promises that I never made."

"You said you'd love me."

"And he said he'd love me, too."

"Who cares about some guy who talks too much!?" he demanded. "He gambled away your feelings and didn't give a damn!"

"I gave up a lot for him," the other whispered with a hint of ferocity.

"And he tossed it all aside like it was nothing," he finished. "Like it was worthless trash. Are you happy with the risk you took?" The other said nothing, so he continued. "You could have had me without a fight. I would have loved you and never done anything to let you down. But instead --"

"Instead I went for the wild card and ended up getting hurt," the other cut off. "It was better than not trying and being unhappy not knowing what could have been."

"I don't understand you," he said.

"No one said you had to."

"What am I supposed to do?" he asked. "All I know is that you're all I want."

"I don't have the answers."

"But you refuse to have me."

"No. I'm just not going to go so soon from him to you."

"You're selfish," he accused.

The other shrugged. "If you want to think that, you can. But I'm not going to satisfy your whims if I'm not sincere." This time, he was the speechless one, so the other resumed. "It doesn't mean anything if I don't mean it. I'm between lovers. I'm trying to sort it out, if you can grasp that."

"Do you expect me to wait around forever?"

"You told me you would."

"I never said that," he refuted.

"Like I never said I'd always love you."

Again, he said nothing. The sun was almost fully set, and the many miniscule stars were beginning to peek though the inky canopy of the sky, as if it had been pricked open with pins. Something about the coming darkness made him understand.

"I'll talk to him," he said, looking down into the dark water. "I make him understand that he made a mistake."

"You won't do that."

"He'll listen to me, and then he'll take you back."

"And you think that your foolish actions will make me suddenly love you again?" the other questioned. "I'm not the selfish one when you're using those reasons. I won't be happy going back to him. You don't see that."

"Seems like I don't see a lot of things."

"You don't." The other took out a cigarette and lit it. "You end up so blinded by your idealism, the over-romanticized image of being together with me, being happy, that you can't set your sights on the plausible means towards the goal. You overcomplicate it." 

He watched as the other exhaled. A smoky cloud had surrounded the words.

"I'm right in front of you," he said, "and I love you. Isn't that what matters?"

"No," the other said. "It's more than that. If he taught me anything, it's that the rational don't rush into those three little words as quickly as we all do."

"So I'm a fool now?"

"Don't act like that. I didn't say that."

"What do you care about how I act?"

The other flung his cigarette over the bridge and into the water.

"You're right, I don't. Go home." Still terse, simple, bitter.

"I'll wait," he said. Still blindly dependent. 

"I know. And when I'm ready, you'll know."

They turned their backs to each other, but this time, both would remember their promises.


End file.
